Ponderings and Musings

POETRY COLLECTION

2011-06-01T09:06:00.000+08:00

05/15/09

Love is a salve as the summer breeze,

Gently cooling, softly whispering to ease.

A moment’s battle, an hour’s struggle,

All vanish quickly in a mother’s cuddle.

I hear mother’s whisper, caressing me tender,

The warmth in her bosom providing a shelter.

Lull me to slumber, hold me forever,

In a world of deception, confusion and terror.

08/10/09

Luha ng Kahapon

Ano pa ang silbi ng bawat araw ko, sinta,

Kung sa paglipas nito’y ‘di ka makikita?

Ano pa ang silbi ng ganda ng umaga,

Kung sa paglipas nito’y ‘di sisilay iyong mukha?

Ano pa ang silbi ng katha o tula,

Kung sa bawat linya nito’y ‘di ka kasama?

Ano’ng puwang sa mundo nitong aking puso,

Kung ang bawat tibok nito’y walang tinig o tono?

Ikaw ang nagbigay-kulay sa madilim kong mundo.

Ang liwanag at init na tumunaw sa aking puso.

Ano pa ang silbi ng bukas at ngayon,

Kung ang puso’y baon sa alaala ng kahapon?

Ano pa ang silbi ng pag-ibig o paghanga,

Kung ang taong paglalaana’y tuluyan nang nawala?

Ano pa ang silbi ng sukat at tugma,

Kung ang sugat sa puso’y ‘di maghihilom pa?

2003 (published in The Rosarian, UST-EHS’s official student newspaper)

Busal

Isang umaga, habang lulan ng jeep,

Pumasok sa paaralan kasabay ang mga taong nagmamadali.

Dalawang kapwa drayber ang nag-usap sa ‘king harapan,

Kahapon lamang nang masawi ang isang kasamahan.

Sa ‘di malamang dahilan, namatay nga ba?

O pinatay ng isang taong hawak ang susi ng kapangyarihan?

Ayon sa kanila, nagtangka raw itong manlaban,

Sa mapaniil na kamay na bakal ng nasa itaas.

Sadya nga bang nararapat na ito ang kasapitan,

Ng maliit na mamamayang ipinagtanggol ang kanyang KARAPATAN?

At paano pa nagagawang tumawa ng mga ito,

Sa kapwa nila na halos katulad ng kanilang mundo?

Nabibilang sa parehong katayuan,

Kaya’t kanila ring nalalaman,

Mga sulirani’t ugat ng kasawian,

Ng kaaba-abang nilalang na pinagkaitan,

Nang nararapat sana’y kanyang KARAPATAN.

Lihim akong nainis sa kanilang pagtudyo,

Tingin ko sa kanila’y parang mga Hudyo!

Matahimik sana ang iyong kaluluwa,

Naawa sana ang sa’yo’y pumaslang,

Lalo na sa naiwan mong pamilya.

Walang awang pinatay upang mapagtakpan,

Ang itinatagong baho’t madilim na katotohanan…

11/11/08

Lunatic’s Sonata (version I) (Original title: Sonata for the Necrophilic)

Lost in the rhythm,

Your hands move through the ivory keys.

The music is filling your eyes with tears.

The moon watches over the lunatic,

Who solemnly wishes he does not fall asleep.

Hopelessly praying God shall not move the day,

Curse the dawn, stop the twilight,

For she is all his tonight!

She sits at the far corner of the pitch dark room,

Hands clasped, eyes tightly shut,

Immobile, her fingers not moving an inch.

His fingers now struck the last note of the masterpiece,

Thanks to Beethoven, the sonata is now finished!

He moves closer, kisses her lips tenderly,

Yet she is all cold and silent for eternity…

11/11/08

Fireflies

A soft breeze blows through the trees,

As they silently witness my flowing tears.

When all of a sudden, tiny creatures with wings,

Caught my eyes as they move in such magical gleam.

I heard Mama’s voice softly calling my name,

Such gentleness slowly healing my immense pain.

“Child, listen. Fireflies are the closest resemblance of the stars,

Hold them closely and they’ll give you such glow and warmth.

For spirits like stars, watch over us every night,

Seeing them needed not the eyes or thy sight.”

I felt the cool touch of the wind on my skin caressing me lightly,

Mother, is that you hugging me tightly?

12/07/07

There is nothing but unspoken words between us,

These walls that separate the two of us.

If I reach out, would you hold my hand,

Would you promise to stay and not stray apart?

If I call out your name, would you call out back,

Would you tell me you love me or just hold back that love?

There is nothing but unspoken words between us,

Do you know these unspoken words are killing us?

02/14/01 (A poem I made for someone when I was still in first year high school. This is just an excerpt. I can’t remember the remaining lines.)

Solitude

Alone, I stand upon the shadows,

The shadows cast around circles.

Around circles filled with crowds surrounding you,

Keeping you away, so far away from me.

06/10/04

Kaluluwang Naglalakbay sa Kawalan

Batang umiiyak sa kawalan,

Nilamon ng iyong kadiliman ang liwanag.

Ang paninging kusang pumanaw, kumulimlim,

Isipang dinungisan ng taglay mong lagim.

Umaasa, naninikluhod habang nakatanaw sa kalangitan,

At sa puso mo’y namutawi isang inusal mong dasal.

Sa tulad mong uhaw sa pagmamahal,

Pag-unawa’t pagkalinga ng sa’yo’y lumalang.

Inaasam ang kapatawaran ng Iyong Tgapaglikha,

Ikaw ba’y natatakot sa sasapiting sumpa?

Nang apoy na tumupok sa iyong mga pakpak,

Upang mahulog sa dagat na aanod sa paniniwala.

Ang ulos ang nagtakda sa iyong kapalaran,

Huli na ba ang lahat?

Bakit nagsusumigaw ang Kamatayan?

12/02/07

Papercut

This as the metal sheet man made,

The wind cuts deep through the skin like a blade.

It howls loudly to the soul piercing the fragile heart,

The soul bleeds inevitably, broken like mirror shards.

This coaxing wind blowing forcibly through the walls,

Blood dripping slowly from the veins,

Tears silently shed for that dying maiden.

Hands reaching towards the sky,

“Father, save me,” her voice calls to Him,

The one who fashioned her every part and being.

Wondering if He heard her summon Him from afar,

As she slowly takes her breath to be one with the stars…

12/02/07

(One of the poems I remembered him criticizing and said it’s better if I change turbulent to ‘bewildered.’ =) )

She call upon her muses to sing her a lullaby,

For her turbulent spirit cannot be calmed.

Thoughts swim like whirlpools of water,

And her soul is being swallowed by the quicksand of her world…

There is nothing but emptiness in that lone universe,

Where there is none who dwells in its core.

She is drenched by the brine waters of the sea,

The liquid that flows freely from her eyes.

Praying that a salve may serve as a cure,

To that lasting emptiness within her soul.

When you find there is no purpose for you on this world,

Death shall slowly creep through those fragile bones…

12/02/07

Empty as a blank sheet and slate,

Pure and frigid as that pristine snow,

Clear and smooth as that running stream or brook,

Her mind holds nothing but an empty world,

Where are her muses to sing her a lullaby?

Where is her heart? Does she know how to cry?

What is pain? Is there agony?

Pretending she is not in misery,

Where are those sullen tears?

Dear lady, do you know how to weep?

Whispering emptiness in this miserable world,

Wishing Death to come knocking and end that suffering soul.

01/12/07 ( A poem I composed after remembering what I did a few weeks ago, like burning some useless papers and memories…)

Arson

Crumpled sheets of paper,

Letters scribbled and scattered on each page.

Empty words of love, disillusioned promises,

A mirage of an envisioned passion,

Written as figment of one’s imagination.

A love born in a tapestry of lies,

Her heart torn asunder, brine wells fall down her eyes.

Slowly, she tears the pages,

While remembering the face of the man she loves.

Slowly, she drops the pages down,

Where the furnace embrace them in its blazing warmth.

Slowly, she reminisced the memories they had,

Where the bitter fang of truth poisoned her heart.

Slowly, the pages are consumed by the fire,

Where the ashes remain as the ugly reminder of that love.

There is no turning back,

So she chooses to live her life.

01/13/07

Mata Hari (A poem I made after reading Mata Hari’s life.)

Lovely enchantress, dance with me tonight,

With the moon and the stars watching thy graceful flight.

Oh, mystical seductress, men swoon for thine eyes,

Longing to own you even for just one night.

Listen, they promise eternal treasures,

Just to imprison you in their arms.

Yet, a stealthy glow was found in those mystic eyes.

Should you deceive or remain loyal?

Their hearts become captives of your charms…

And the silence was broken,

The melody stopped all of a sudden!

You feet were entangled to the chains of fire,

They found you guilty of a heinous crime.

An innocent perpetrator held in a shameful trial,

A traitor to your country, a despicable spy!

You were destined to face such fatal line,

Bullets cut through that soft, desired flesh,

As the passion of men in guns put an end to your distress.

Lovely enchantress, soon you become one with the stars…

05/28/2011

Kapag naupo ako sa isang sulok,

Asahan mong hindi ito pagmumukmok.

Maaaring ‘di mo alam, ako’y manlalakbay,

Habang ang isip ko’y naglalayag sa malawak na kawalan.

Heto na naman ako,

Hawak ang papel at pluma ko.

Habang nagmamadaling isulat ang nasa isip ko.

Abalang binibisita ang sarili kong mundo.

Maaari kang sumama kung interesado ka,

Iilan lang ang nakababasa ng aking likha.

Pasensya na, inaantok ka ba?

Ganyan talaga kapag ‘di matalos ang akda.

Hinihintay kong magmukmok kang tulad ko,

At makiumpok sa espasyo dito sa tabi ko.

Masasanay ka rin sa aking mundo,

Malay mo, balang araw, maging iyo na ito?

Another set of writer's itch

2011-05-21T02:35:00.000+08:00

(I checked my organizer and found these poems written on several pages. Out of boredom and while waiting for my turn to donate some blood, I decided to write these poems as pastime.

I always try to make sure I do something worthwhile during my free times.)

June 3, 2010 (1:36 p.m.)

JAPAYUKI

Ayoko sa Japayuki.

Maamoy,

Malansa,

at matitinik kang talaga.

Maraming lalaki,

ang may gusto sa Japayuki.

Pero, hindi ako.

Hinding-hindi ako.

Magkamatayan man tayo!

Kadalasan,

siya ay napalilibutan ng ilaw.

At palaging grandeng entrada,

ang sumasalubong sa kanya.

Kinailangang mag-Niponngo,

at magsalitang tila may sipon.

Parang may nakabara sa ilong,

sana'y pati sa kanyang dumurugong puso.

Ayoko sa Japayuki...

Amoy pa lang,

nakasusulasok na!

lalo na't 'pag natikman,

kanyang pira-pirasong laman.

Ayokong matinik at mahirinan,

mapaprito man 'yan o sinigang.

Ngunit patuloy siyang sumasayaw,

sa gitna nang nagpapalitang ilaw.

Sa Kabuki, ikaw ang pangunahing tauhan.

Itago mo ang luha,

magpinta ng ngiti sa mukha!

Ayoko sa Japayuki!

Ang lahat-lahat ng tungkol sa kanya.

Ang pang-aalipusta at pandudusta,

pilit niyayakap niya,

para sa iilang lapad,

dangal mo'y ibinilad.

Ngunit, Japayuki ka man,

'di ka huhusgahan.

Hudas lamang ang magbubuhat

ng sarili sa pedestal!

Japayuki ka,

oo, iyon ka.

Subalit tao ka.

At hindi isang

nakapandidiring isda...

June 3, 2010 (2:30 p.m.)

Usapan sa Blood Bank

Sa gawing kaliwa,

umaalingawngaw

sapantaha ng dalwang 'di nasisiyahan,

sa pagkapanalo ni Noynoy,

sila'y 'di kumbinsido.

Gusto ni Ate si Teodoro,

si Kuya nama'y nakikinig sa kanyang sentimyento.

Tatlong lalaki ang kangina'y nag-umpukan,

Usapan ang 'flavor of the month' nila.

'Yung isa, huli sa aktong nangangaliwa,

Si Ma'am ang lihim niyang pantasya.

Katextmate, 'di mabilang,

kabi-kabila ang kasagutan.

Ngiting aso ang dalawa,

suportado ang kaibigan nila.

Mahaba ang pila,

at ako'y nanlalamig na.

Subalit sa blood screening,

'di makakawala!

Tuloy ang usapan.

May bagong umpukan,

usapang labada, abala si Ina,

naiwan ang mga anak niya,

may magbabantay ba sa kanila?

Mauulinig ang alingawngaw,

samantalang ako'y nasa loob ng silid na.

Naiinip na matawag,

subalit, 'di pa tapos ang laban.

Sa loob, inquirer si Dok,

kinukumpirma kay Manong kanyang mga sagot.

May AIDS ka ba? Naiintindihan mo ba?

'Pagkat sakit na ito'y nakahahawa,

automatic rejection 'pag napatunayan na.

Solohin mo ang sakit mo't

'wag mandamay ng iba!

Ang haba ng proseso,

sa pagkuha ng dugo,

Naiinip na ako sa sobrang bagal nito.

Pampalipas-oras ang tulang ito,

Ngunit 'di pa rin nasusuri ang aking dugo.

June 3, 2010 (4:11 p.m.)

Nag-iisa

ang mangangatha.

walang kapiling

kundi ang tula.

Kataka-talang

sa laksa-laksang tanan,

matitipon ang daan-daang salita.

Malayang nagliliwaliw

itong isip na magiliw.

Pilit niyang inaaliw

ang sariling pagkabaliw.

Libu-libong mga salita,

daan-daan katha.

Subalit, magpatuloy man ang mga kamay,

Sa pagsusulat,

pagbubulay-bulay,

pagkukulay,

mananatiling malumbay,

ang pusong inalila mo ____________.

Please observe the Intellectual Property Rights.

-- Raphaelle (I. N. J.)

Apat na Tula (Gawa-gawa dahil walang magawa)

2011-03-25T08:07:00.000+08:00

(Writer's note: All of these poems were made last Sept. 2, 2010, in front of the school canteen in TIP Arlegui, Manila while studying for that dreaded subject known as 'Special Topics.' At least, my efforts did not become futile. I survived Topics. Hooray!)

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Nagbabadya ang kalawakan,

nagsasalimbayan sa kawalan.

pira-pirasong alaala ng nakaraan,

nagsisilbing tila mumo ng bubog.

sa mundong 'di tumitigil sa pag-inog.

Samahan mo ako,

tuklasin ang lihim ng mundo.

Kung ang luha ay gamot

na hihilom sa lungkot,

ikaw nga ba'y isang sugat na 'di malilimot?

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PUTI

Ito ay kadalisayan,

kabusilakan ng pusong sugatan,

dungisan mo at bahiran,

at agad na magmamarka.

Pula ang kulay ng dugo,

bahiran mo itong puting mundo,

hayaang ang bawat patay ay dungisan,

nang ang nabahirang kaluluwa ay muling malinisan.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Pakikipag-usap sa Kawalan

Kilala mo ba ako?

Ako ang iyong anino.

Tingnan mo't susunod ako sa iyo,

sa bawat hakbang, pagkilos at pag-ikot mo.

Kaya kong tumalon, lumundag at magtago,

ngunit 'di ko kayang lumuha para sa iyo...

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Mali ka, kaibigan,

kung iniisip mong,

ang pagsusulat ay tuluyang nilimot.

Ang tinapay, 'pag iniwan,

tiyak na nilulumot.

Ngunit 'di ang isip kong,

walang tigil sa paglikot.

Oo nga't kung masda'y

'di naman gumagalaw,

liban lang sa mga kamay,

kumukurbang walang humpay!

Tahimik ma't walang ituran,

ang tinig ko'y umaalingawngaw,

sa malinis na baybayin ,

nitong aking sulatan.

'Di mo lang napapansin,

ang layo't lawak ng lakbayin.

Moog mang ituri'y,

nakalalakad pa rin.

Ang isip ko'y may pakpak,

inaabot ang alapaap.

At sa katahimikan ng mga ulap,

doo'y sasaglit, mangangarap.

Ang mangangatha'y mapapagal,

saglit na mamamahinga,

ngunit pumikit man ang mata,

tatanawin rin ang kalawakan.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

(All poems are strictly for the editor's use only.To my fellow writers, work on your own craft. Please exercise your intellect and observe the Intellectual Property Right.)

-- RAPHAELLE (i.n.j.)

(Nakakatawa man, pero ganito talaga ako magpalipas ng oras. Kapag nakita mo akong umupo sa isang sulok, nakatulala, tahimik at hindi umiimik, beware! Bawal akong istorbohin. Kasi, sa panahong iyon, isa na namang panibagong ideya para sa isang tula o kwento ang pumasok sa isip ko.

Ayoko ng istorbo kapag nagsusulat ako, so back off! Haha! Enjoy!

At bilang pruweba na nag-aaral nga ako ng mga oras na ito, katunayan, nakasulat sa likod ng Chemistry reviewer ko 'yung apat na tula ko. Nauta lang ako sa kababasa ng molecular weight, atomic weight, chu chu at problem solving ng formula mass at balancing chemical equations.

Kaya para hindi ako masyadong ma-pressure, binaba ko muna 'yung periodic table ko at tumunganga. Tapos, natagpuan ko na lang ang sarili kong nagsusulat. Haha!

Siya nga pala, kung itatanong mo sa akin 'yung naging resulta ng exam ko noong araw na iyon, so far, so good. Kaya nga ako pumasa ng Topics eh. Hehe. And after a few days from now, at last, my graduation rites will come.

CONGRATULATIONS BATCH 2011!!!!)

Luklukan

2011-03-19T17:00:00.001+08:00

Marso 19, 2011
Muling mananatali sa pamilyar na sulok,
Sa pamilyar na espasyong ibig na maluklok.
Kung saan payapang magsasalimbayan ang mga alon,
At kusang yayakap sa mga ulap ang mga ibon.

Sabay sa saliw ng mga dahong sumasayaw sa hangin,
Unti-unting ibubulong ang mga alaala’t damdamin.
Nilumot ma’t naluoy mananatili pa rin,
Ang katapata’t kadalisayan nitong dalangin.

Saan nga ba dadalhin ng nakaraan?
Bumubulong sa hangin at sa kawalan.
Ibig kong makasama ang mga alaala,
Sa kabila ng pangungulila’t pag-iisa.

Tanda ko pa ang sulok kung saan ka nakita,
Kung sa’n huling nasilayan ang ngiti sa’yong mukha.
Tila ba ika’y anghel na mamamaalam na,
Kakampay ang mga pakpak tungo sa Ama.

Sana ay sinabi mong ito na ang huli,
Baka sakaling nagmadali’t sa’yo’y sinabi,
“Hintay lang, ‘wag ka namang magmadali,”
“Atin ang oras na ito, dito ka sa ‘king tabi.”
Ngunit huli na, ‘pagkat ikaw ma’y ‘di wari,
Ito na ang huli, ang huli mong ngiti.
Sa mga akda ka na lamang makakasama,
Sa piling ng mga tula tahimik na luluha…

-- Raphaelle (I. N. J.)

( Haven't listened to my muse's song for a long time. I guess, I never really had the time to write down my thoughts on a piece of paper like I always did. But just for a change, I want the letters and I to become one. A writer never ceases to continue pursuing his craft.

Though, one might have chosen a different path, the muse will continue calling for the writer to come back.

This time, I know, the letters and I are intertwined, like two souls interconnected for the rest of time. I long to be one with the letters, capture her every scent and memoir. I long to listen to my hidden thoughts, repressed angry, suppressed tears.

This is I, the writer, the artist, crafting yet another romance with the pen and the paper. I guess, I will never have that special someone. This is the tragic fate of the writer -- longing for a romance that can never be owned, not then, not now, even for an eternity.

So then, let me be buried with my own letters and make a romance out of them. Because I know this is the closest link I have to you.

In pace requiescat.

I offer this art to you -- my dream and my muse.)

Literary (2009)

2010-10-01T10:39:00.002+08:00

Silent Cushion

Silent cushion, be my salve today.
Enchanting melody, lull me to sleep, I pray.
Lost in a universe forbidding time or pain,
So then, I shall close my eyes and lay.

Numb and free of life's bitter blows,
The world looks upon me through a window.
Yet today, silent cushion, encased in your protection,
I shall hear no more of life's cruel jest and vexation.

Lost in deep slumber, then I remember,
That familiar face. For then, I find cause for joy.
Smiling at me, my angel, my comforter,
Holds me forever, in an embrace never to be broken.

(Just another literary emo moment. I wrote this poem some time between May and June 2009. I don't know what's gotten into me for me to imagine myself lying on a mattress inside a coffin. =) Maybe, I just wasn't able to cope up with his loss.

I admit that eventhough it's been a year and seven months since he had gone, I have not completely moved on yet. It's really hard to be bereaved. Though our correspondence may be noted as rather short, to me, it all ready served as a lifetime.

But, I have no other choice. To choose living is to choose suffering each day with the thought of him. However, there won't be tears falling from eyes anymore. It's better to mourn in silence.

My fingers have been itching to write. Yet, I must study for my subjects and do my projects. Buti nga nakanakaw ako ng kaunting panahon ngayon. Lumabas na naman ang naturalesang pagka-literary emo ko.)

Hinahanap-hanap ko rin ang pagsusulat. Panaka-naka pa rin naman akong gumagawa pero, sa journal ko na lang. hinahanap ko rin ang mga araw na nakatatanggap ako ng feedback tungkol sa mga gawa ko. Maybe, I should start contributing to other sites.

2010-03-25T11:08:00.000+08:00

May 5, 2009

There is beauty in absence.
-- Solitary Moonstar, Camera Walls

Saan nga ba patutungo ang entry kong ito? Alam ko at alam mong walang ibang patutunguhan ito kundi -- IKAW.

Magtatatlong buwan na rin simula nang mawala ka. Nalalapit na rin ang finals namin.

Tamang-tama naman, kauuwi ko lang at kapapasak ng mga headphones sa tenga ko para makarinig ng kanta sa radyo. Natural, hiniram ko na naman ang cellphone ni Mama.

Biglang narinig ko ang isang kantang bago sa pandinig ko sa Jam FM. Nakinig ako dahil sadyang nakaeengganyo ang ritmong taglay nang nasabing awiting ito.

Hanggang matunton ko ang linyang sadyang nakapagpagising sa kasalukuyang nalilito kong diwa.

Is there really beauty in absence? To me, absence means emptiness and emptiness eventually leads to pain.

But then again, had I not lost an essential part of me, I would never realize the positive side of absence -- LOVE. We truly appreciate the value of a person once we finally lose him or her.

Nasa punto pa lang ako na matutuklasan ko pa lang na mahal kita. Kung tutuusin, kung nagkatotoo lang sana ang love story nating dalawa, alam kong ito ang bubuo sa isang hungkag na bahagi ng puso ko. Ngayong wala ka na, may pag-asa pa bang mapunan ang espasyong sa'yo lang nakalaan?

Nanghihinayang ako, sa totoo lang. It was only now that I realized, it was YOU all along. You are the embodiment of my ideal man. You are that person I have long sought and dreamt of.

And then, that almost impossible, long-buried dream stole me away from dreaming as I later on found out that all I wanted was to become an international writer.

Mahirap at malamang, maraming taong pagtatawanan ako sa oras na malaman nilang ito ang pangarap ko. Pero, king hindi ako mangangarap nang malaki, ano pa ang silbi nang paghahangad na makilala? Hindi ba, kaya nga tayo binigyan ng Diyos ng kakayahang abutin ang mga pangarap natin ay dahil sa nais niyang gamitin natin ng buo at walang pag-aalinlangan ang mga talentong ibinigay Niya sa atin?

Aking anghel, alam ko, kung naririto ka pa, sususportahan mo ako sa adhikaing ito. Parehas tayong labis ang pagmamahal sa mga letra. Para rin sa iyo ito.

Mahal na mahal kita.

(Raphaelle I. N. J.)

Second Column

2010-02-17T13:46:00.000+08:00

Vraisemblance PS

Cherry Ann A. Rubio

Features and Literary Editor, BSECE V

Ponderings and Musings

“Sometimes, the best things in life happen after you’ve done what you’re supposed to do and are free to follow the path of your dreams.”

I first came across this quote way back in high school. It was written on a bookmark given to us on our graduation rites together with a rosary bearing our school’s seal.

It made me ponder on certain things in my life. It was like an unsolicited advice that came when I badly needed it. Ironically, I was at that point of being torn between pursuing my dream or following my mother’s advice.

To become an engineer was never part of my plan. My life should have taken a different course yet, for some reason, God had provided an unexpected twist to challenge me. Though I do not exactly know why I am here, one thing is for certain -- I am here to fulfill my purpose.

>>> ЂЂ ЂЂ ЂЂ ЂЂ <<<

Makeshift stalls and people from all walks of life filled the busy streets of Divisoria this Christmas season. For a regular commuter passing this route, I feel hassled and pissed off whenever I have to barge my way through the crowd in order to get a ride.

Amidst the crowd and different merchandise covering most of the area, I noticed this group of children aged 5 to 14 years braving the streets to ask for alms from the passengers.

They would distribute ampaos and go back to the entrance of the ride. As expected, they would sing some Christmas carols to entertain the passengers.

I can’t help but be amazed at how courageous these children are. What actually drives them to do this despite the risk of being hit by a vehicle? Where are their parents? They should have been inside the school premises and not found along the streets asking for a few pieces of coins.

Again, this is another sign of poverty. The next president must see this in order for him to conscientiously allocate the funds to the people, especially to those individuals who mostly needed it.

>>> ЂЂ ЂЂ ЂЂ ЂЂ <<<

The news regarding the massacre of 57 people in Maguindanao shook the country. Majority of the casualties were women, including media personnel and relatives of the Mangudadatu clan. To make matters worse, the vice mayor’s wife was raped before being executed.

The tragedy had just exposed one of the country’s weaknesses – our faulty democracy. The Philippines prides itself for upholding the rights of its citizens through a democratic form of government. However, what happened is already a clear indication of human rights violation.

This is how cynical politics goes in the country. Greedy people aspiring to hold the seat of power will use all means in order to get what they wanted – including killing innocent people.

Thanks to the tragedy, our country can now be tagged as one of the most dangerous places for media personnel. The number of casualties involving media men continues to escalate. Furthermore, no extrajudicial killing case has been solved until now.

The state of Maguindanao was placed under martial rule. The action taken was too harsh considering that other measures may be considered in order to bring back the peace and order in Mindanao. Majority of the residents’ rights was again trampled due to this hasty decision.

This is not the first time that we experienced political killings. The event only served as an eye-opener to every Filipino. If not for the fact that majority of the casualties involved were media men, people will simply shrug their shoulders and think that this is one of those common things expected to happen during elections. And the rest is left to oblivion.

>>> ЂЂ ЂЂ ЂЂ ЂЂ <<<

Educational institutions must keep in mind that students enroll in schools to attain holistic development. This pertains not only to their academic performance but also, to the honing of their character and potential.

The foundation of a student’s character is based on his values. The formation of one’s character depends mainly on the type of environment he is in and the people he mingles with and admires.

Students look up to their instructors as their second parents. They emulate their example. Instructors, in turn, play a vital role in the holistic development of a student. It is through their example that they may change to become better persons, or develop into another problem of the society.

After several years as a student, I have observed many problems that exist within the academic community. These are needed to be addressed the soonest time possible because the remedy has to be applied immediately.

Bias – to ECE and EE students, the term may either refer to forward or reverse voltage applied to semiconductor devices for several operations. To the entire student population, this simply refers to the unjust treatment of teachers to their students.

While it is true that it is difficult to remove biases, instructors must keep in mind that they serve as models to their students. They must not forget that the lessons they must impart included not only the academic aspect, but also, the values of respect, integrity and fairness.

I am still hoping for that ideal instructor to come and change my views regarding the injustice starting inside the four corners of the classroom.

(Raphaelle I.N.J)

Got an idea to share? Trespass the author’s lair at www.vraisemblance.blogspot.com and carve up a piece of your mind at rcyan_kaede@yahoo.com.

For Writers (Batch Baboy, Malaki, Matarush and Kulang-kulang)

2009-12-23T18:29:00.002+08:00

TOPICS FOR FEATURE FEB ISH:
1) Declining 5S culture in TIP
2) Declining cultural arts inclination of TIP students
3) Filipinos receiving global commendations
4) Impressing your professor
5) Alcoholism
6) Juvenile delinquency
7) Wayward students

Feature articles are write-ups that delve on a variety of issues, experiences, opinions and ideas. Its main purpose will vary depending on the media it is meant for. For example, as writers for the TIP Voice publication, our readers would come from the TIP community, particularly, our fellow students. Our main objective is to tackle topics or issues that will capture their interests or points of view.

It differs greatly from a straight news story in a manner that it explores more on an issue, gives depth to it and adds a certain ‘feel’ that the mentioned article type cannot provide.

ELEMENTS OF FEATURE ARTICLES

1) Creativity – It is an important element that allows the writer to create a story virtually at will.

2) Subjectivity – This is when the writer injects his own thoughts and emotions.

3) Informative – It is constructive information of an aspect of life or situation that may escape coverage in hard news stories.

4) Entertainment – ‘color story’ aimed at capturing the mood of an event.

5) Imperishability – Its value does not diminish with time and rarely suffers from deadline pressure.

NOTE:

Correct spelling and appropriate usage of words are MUSTS in feature writing. It is important for a writer to have a ‘feel’ for words – an ability for choosing the right word to use in order to convey his intended meaning correctly. Too much usage of highfalutin terms, oftentimes, ruins your article, especially if your target readers are students. It is okay to use a few but overdoing it will only make you lose your audience.

Types of Features

Personality profiles: A personality profile is written to bring an audience closer to a person in or out of the news. Interviews and observations, as well as creative writing, are used to paint a vivid picture of the person. The CBC’s recent profile of Pierre Elliot Trudeau is a classic example of the genre and makes use of archival film footage, interviews, testimonials, and fair degree of editorializing by the voice-over commentary.

Human interest stories: A human interest story is written to show a subject’s oddity or its practical, emotional, or entertainment value.

Trend stories: A trend story examines people, things or organizations that are having an impact on society. Trend stories are popular because people are excited to read or hear about the latest fads.

In-depth stories: Through extensive research and interviews, in-depth stories provide a detailed account well beyond a basic news story or feature.

Backgrounders: A backgrounder--also called an analysis piec--adds meaning to current issues in the news by explaining them further. These articles bring an audience up-to-date, explaining how this country, this organization, this person happens to be where it is now.

STEPS IN WRITING FEATURE ARTICLES

Now that you know what a feature article is, how do you begin writing one?

1) Know your target audience. In this case, the TIP community serves as our main reader. Anything that you think will capture their interest or inspire them can be used as your main subject for a write-up. For example, the sudden surge of oil prices (as what happened in the first few months of the year) may be used as your topic for your article. Majority of the student population are commuters. They are also affected by the inflation of oil products and services because it might also cause the increase on their usual fare.

2) Timeliness. Since we have a limited audience (and space for that matter), it is important for writers to consider the timeliness of an issue. This refers to the appropriateness of a topic with respect to the period it will be published. A good example would be choosing to write about topics related to love or other matters connected to it for the February issue.

3) Choose a topic. The inspiration for a topic can be found almost everywhere. But since we are targeting the TIP population, it would be best to center on things that they are interested with.

4) Research well about your chosen topic. It is important for a good writer to have substantial records and information to use for his article. Facts establish the integrity and solidity of an article. These will also help you out to bring out the particular color or feel that you want to put in your article. Do not just rely on the topic you are going to make a write-up for. You may also gather data about other matters related to it. Interviews from different people significant to your topic will help you a lot as go about your article. It will give the readers a clear picture of what is going on in your article and help them establish your ideas in their minds.

5) Choose your angle. Topics for a feature article are usually broad. It would be better if you narrow it down to a certain point that is directly connected to your readers. In order to illustrate this, the subject on oil inflation can be further narrowed to its effects to the students. You may choose to interview a student who has a father driving a jeepney, taxi or bus.

6) Do not underestimate the power of an outline. After making a thorough research, sort out your facts. Arrange them according to their significance with respect to your angle. Organize your ideas. Do not sloppily place them on your article just to be able to pass a write-up. Poor organization of data leads to a bombardment of ideas.

7) Do not forget to indicate subheadings. Transition is an important factor to consider in feature writing. Subheadings help a writer to establish the smooth flow of ideas. These separate different concepts from each other.

8) Nail your point in your conclusion. Leave something for your readers to ponder on. You may end your article by using an interesting quote, connecting your conclusion to your lead or providing a future outcome that may be seen for your issue tackled.

Please visit http://oonyeoh.squarespace.com/guide-to-feature-writing/2005 for more details regarding the Blundell Technique.

SOURCES:

http://oonyeoh.squarespace.com/guide-to-feature-writing/2005/7/9/tutorial-i-the-blundell-technique.html

http://www.media-studies.ca/articles/feature.htm

Beauty in Silence

2009-11-07T18:12:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, some things are better left unsaid.

There are times when talking about your feelings is not the best thing to do. Though most people would advice that speaking your heart out is the best remedy, the truth is, even being honest with what you feel is not the best thing decision to make -- especially, when the people around you, particularly those you are expecting to give you comfort, are also hurting just like you.

Sa maraming pagkakataon, pinipili ko na lamang manahimik at hindi magbanggit ng anumang bagay na patungkol sa'yo dahil masakit talaga. Hindi naman kasi ganoon kadaling ibalik ang buhay mo sa dating takbo nito matapos mawala sa iyo ang isang tao.

Ipokrito lang ang magsasabing ayos lang siya kahit na alam niyang mahalaga ang taong nawala sa kanya. Plastic lang ang magsasabing hindi siya nasaktan -- kahit na alam niyang gusto pa niyang makasama ang taong iyon sa mga susunod na segundo, minuto, oras, buwan at taon ng buhay niya...

Madalas, tumatahimik lang ako lalo na sa mga pagkakataong naiiisip kita. Mas gusto kong sarilinin na lang ang mga panahong sumasaglit ka sa isip ko. Palagi kasi nila akong sinasabihang emotera at walang ibang alam na emosyon kundi ang kalungkutan.

Marunong din naman akong maging masaya at tumawa, subalit, hindi sa ganitong pagkakataong gustong umiyak ng puso ko. Pakiramdam ko, kalahati ng pagkatao ko ang nawala simula nang umalis ka. You complete me in so many ways, more than you could ever imagine.

Yet, though I fully acknowledge your role in this part of my life, unfortunately, the words would never find their way to you. Sometimes, I want to ask God if you have computer or LAN connections in heaven.

Hindi na ako nagsasalita. Hindi na ako kumikibo. Pero, ano naman ang gagawin ko kung ang mga tao sa paligid ko na ang pilit nagpapaalala sa akin ng lahat? Kung kahit pinipili ko nang hindi ka banggitin ay sila naman ang pilit naghahalungkat ng lahat kahit alam nilang nasasaktan ka sa ginagawa nila?

I wanted to scream, shout and tell them to get their heads off my life yet, for some reason, I do not possess the courage to do that. Paano ba nila maiintindihang ayoko nang ibalik ang nakaraan? Na katulad nila, gusto ko na ring bumangon mula sa pagkakalugmok upang ipagpatuloy ang buhay ko.

Akala nila, nakakatulong sa akin ang pag-uulit-ulit nila ng pangalan mo. Ang hindi nila alam, dahil sa ginagawa nila, mas lalo tuloy kitang hindi makalimutan.

Isa lang naman ang gusto kong mangyari sa mga oras na ito -- ang makatagpo ng isang taong pwede kong yakapin at iyakan. Isang taong pwede kong sabihin ang nararamdaman ko.

Nasasaktan kasi ako. Ang sakit-sakit na sa palagay ko, hindi naman nagagawang ibsan gaano man katagal o kabilis tumakbo ang panahon.

Time itself cannot lessen the pain. But, it helps you get used to it, until you finally get to learn how to live with it, bear with it and suffer without having to destroy yourself and your life.

Pero, sa mga oras na ito, wala akong makitang taong pwedeng kong masandalan at maiyakan. Ang mga taong madalas kong kasama ngayon ay marami ring mga problemang pinapasan.
Ayoko nang dumagdag pa sa dalahin nila.

Natatakot akong magsabi sa kanila dahil malamang, pagtatawanan lamang nila ako at hindi paniniwalaan... Sanay na kasi silang ganito ako. Ano bang bago?

Kahit umiyak pa ako ng dugo, wala na ring halaga iyon sa kanila.

Sana, kahit man lang sa panaginip, ay makita kita.

Please. Just this once.

(Raphaelle I.N.J.)

Prologue

2009-10-07T19:38:00.000+08:00

Prologue

Cherry Ann A. Rubio
B.S. E.C.E., 5th year
rcyan_kaede@yahoo.com

The only joy in the world is to begin. -- Cesare Pavese

The first taste of absolute independence occurred to me on the 21st year of my existence.

It all happened out of necessity. Being new in the position, I had to cooperate with my fellow editors in editing the galley for our latest issue. Our meeting place was set in Bicutan.

The most convenient way to arrive at my destination was riding the LRT from our home. Unexpectedly, it turned out to be my first time to ride the LRT all ALONE, without even a friend to accompany me on the way.

With all the courage I have mustered, I tried to act unaffected despite the fact that I was scared and uneasy on my seat. The uncertainty of whether I would be able to arrive at my destination unscathed made me queasy. It was a good thing that somebody announces what station we will be in the next few minutes. If not, I would have to depend on my own instincts.

The same situation applies to the current situation of the Philippines. In a democratic country like ours, it is very ironic to talk about a kind of freedom whose essence cannot be completely felt.

Think about the proposed right of reply bill gagging the freedom of expression, extrajudicial killings of media men, attempts of changing the charter and masses striving to free themselves from the fangs of the monster called POVERTY.

Think about the influences imprinted by the colonizers on the minds of the Filipinos. Think about the volatile and vulnerable situation our economy is currently experiencing. Our economy is especially dependent on the outside forces that may either make or break it.

Relating this to my first experience of riding the LRT alone, beginners are usually scared of taking that first step forward. We are scared of making that first move towards complete liberty. If this country is truly democratic and allows each Filipino to freely exercise his or her rights, then there would be no people marching on the streets shouting to the top of their lungs in order for their voices to be heard. They have the right to peaceful assembly yet policemen treat them inhumanely.

There would be no Filipino chained by the shackles of poverty and ignorance, no stomachs grumbling of hunger or workers treated like slaves in their own country.

Oh well, enough of this ironic freedom talk. Perhaps, we need to wait for a few more years before the country reaches its true state of democracy.

* * *

First time voters are now feeling the pressure of selecting the right people to hold the seat of power. People from all walks of life are upholding the importance of using the right to suffrage. However, it is disheartening to know that it had to take many years before people came to realize the essence of placing a name on the ballot. It had to take a hundred mistakes, thousands of lives, and centuries of cultural, political and social decline before Filipinos decided to act, make a change and stand up for their rights.

With all the efforts extended by the media to protect the credibility of votes, let us just hope and pray that in the coming 2010 elections, we are able to choose the right candidate not on the basis of the number of hours or days that an advertisement of a political figure is shown on the screen, coercion from outside forces telling you whom you should put on your ballot, and endless promises from sweet-talkers. As individuals entitled to hold the future of this country, we must not let our choice be affected by other people to avoid regrets in decision-making.

I once regretted letting other people influence my vote. On my first attempt to practice this right, I had written a name said to be the least evil among other candidates. Now, as time progressed, the least evil turned out to be the worst evil that existed. If you want proof, try visiting our barangay sometime.

* * *

Despite the constant persuasion from my fellow staffers to join writing contests, I only gave in on the fourth time that I was asked to try.

The Blas Ople Essay Writing competition was my first attempt to join a writing contest in TIP. Eventhough I did not win the first prize, it was a learning experience for me.

To be honest, I had doubts pursuing my entry. Had I not considered the efforts we made to find the information needed to write about Sen. Ople, I would have backed out. The fact that we chose to go to the Department of Foreign Affairs library on Quiapo Day (there were no classes then) made me change my mind.

It was exactly on the day of the deadline that I started doing my draft for the contest. By 12:03 a.m. of January 27, I passed my work with fingers crossed (literally) and all hopes of being recognized gone into oblivion. I just need to give justice to the efforts we made.

“Hangga’t may oportunidad, sabak lang ng sabak. Subok lang ng subok. Hindi naman mahalagang manalo tayo. Ang mahalaga, sinubukan nating sumali at tayo mismo ang gumawa ng paraan para lumago ang kakayahan natin sa pagsusulat.”

These words boosted my morale even further. It was funny that it had to take a Conrado Macapulay, Jr. to convince me that winning was not the most important thing in the world. It is in your effort to do things that the impossible are made possible.

To the first editor who believed in my potential and who persuaded me to become the writer that I am today, I dedicate my first column to you.

But then again, you have finally succumbed to the pleas of Hypnos.

Sssh… Silence. You need to rest.

In pace requiescat.

Borrowed

2009-09-02T19:40:00.000+08:00

Kanina, matapos ang isang oras nang nakaaantok kong klase sa kabila, bumalik ako sa aming luklukan upang mag-aral para sa pagsusulit ko bukas. (Nosebleed!) Hahaha!

Wala akong balak mag-senti pero ganun ang nangyari.

Habang kasalukuyan kong binabagtas ang daan patungo sa opisina, napasulyap ako sa kalangitan. Napansin ko ang dalawang bagay -- ang buwan at isang bituing tila nagmamasid sa kagandahan nito.

Hinihiram lamang ng buwan ang kanyang liwanag sa araw. Samantalang, ang bituin ay kayang magbigay-liwanag sa sariling pamamaraan nito.

Umiikot ang buwan sa mundo habang ang bituin nama'y umiikot sa walang partikular na patutunguhan. Palibot-libot lamang ito sa kawalan, sa paraang gusto nito nang walang inaalalang anumang bagay...

Napaisip tuloy ako. Tayong dalawa, parang tayong dalawa ang buwan at bituin.

Ikaw, nabubuhay ngayon dito sa mundo sa pamamagitan nang paghiram sa mga alaala ko. Ang bawat paghinga, pagtawa, pagkilos at buntunghininga -- tandang-tanda ko pa ang lahat ng mga iyon. At sa tuwing maaalala ko ang mga bagay na iyon, hindi ko mapigilan ang pagguhit ng sakit sa puso ko.

Oo, siguro nga, dapat nakalimot na ako. Pero, paano ko gagawin iyon kung lahat ng bagay at taong nakapaligid sa akin ay walang ginawa kundi ipaalala ka? Naalala kita sa bawat araw at buwang lumilipas sa buhay ko... At kahit pinipilit ko ang sarili kong manatiling manhid at walang pakiramdam sa mga pagkakataong bumabalik ka sa isip ko, hindi pa rin ako nagtatagumpay.

May mga araw na hinihiling kong sana, magkaroon na lang ako ng amnesia. It was said that there are only two things that can erase memories -- AMNESIA and DEATH.

And I know that I still have a long life ahead of me. I do not wish to live each second in misery and agony.

Sawang-sawa na akong umiyak. Subalit, ano ang magagawa ko kung iyon ang pinakamabisang lunas sa sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon? May maibibigay ka bang gamot para maibsan ang lungkot ko dahil nahihirapan akong mabuhay nang wala ka?

Bakit mo ako iniwan? Alam kong isa akong bituing magagawang manatili sa mundo kahit wala ka. Hindi ko kailangan nang kahit sinumang masasandigan upang magpatuloy at maging masaya.

Pero, alam ko sa puso kong kasinungalingan iyon.

Dahil, kailangan kita.

AT ISANG KASINUNGALINGAN ANG BUHAY KO NGAYON DAHIL WALA KA NA.

Alam kong ayaw mong nalulungkot ang mga tao sa paligid mo. A yaw mong may umiiyak. Ayaw mong may nagdurusa.

Pero, masisisi mo ba ako kung kasalukuyan akong nahihirapang ipagpatuloy ang buhay ko dahil wala ka?

Sabi ko pa naman sa sarili ko, hindi ko kailangan ang kahit sinuman para mabuhay. Hindi ako aasa sa kahit sinuman para maging masaya.

Pero, binali mong lahat ang plano ko. Sinira mo ang mga bagay na matagal ko nang sinusunod at binibigyang-pansin.

Asan ka na ba? Naririnig mo ba ang mga dasal ko riyan sa langit?

Lord, please. Pakisabi sa kanyang mahal na mahal ko siya.

Bigyan mo po ako ng lakas na mabuhay kahit na wala na siya...

Idiosyncrasy

2009-07-30T16:46:00.000+08:00

Idiosyncrasy -- a word used to describe an odd behavior or habit done by a person.

Una kong nakita ang salitang ito sa isang libro sinasagutan ko noong elementary pa lang ako (if I'm not mistaken, Grade 4 yata).

Isa sa mga idiosyncrasy ko simula pa noong bata ako ay ang palagiang pagbibitbit ng bag saanman ako pumunta. Madalas nga akong sitahin ng Mama ko dahil dahil daw para akong abnormal na laging may dalang bag kahit hindi naman papasok sa eskwelahan.

Sabi niya, ugaling matanda raw ang pinaiiral ko. Mahilig sa bagahe, pagtatabi ng mga abubot at mga bagay-bagay na ipinapalagay niyang 'basura.'

Marahil, sa mura kong edad, nagawa ko nang malaman kung ano ba talaga ang gusto kong gawin sa buhay. Gusto kong maging isang manlalakbay. Gusto kong makarating sa malayong mga lugar na tanging sa imahinasyon ko lamang maaabot.

Hindi magawang maintindihan ng Mama ko kung ano'ng klaseng ugali ba ang mayroon ako at kung ano ba ang mga dahilan ko sa paggawa ng iba't ibang bagay sa mundo.

Subalit ngayong unti-unti ko nang binabasag ang aking katahimikan, nagagawa niya nang maunawaan ang daan-daang nakatagong sakit sa aking puso at isipan.

(Masyado na 'ata akong nalalayo sa paksa ko.)

Mahilig akong lumibot sa bawat sulok ng aming bahay. Sa katunayan, nahihilo na nga ang mga magulang at kapatid ko sa kaiikot ko. Dinadaan-daanan ko sila na para bang walang ibang tao sa bahay namin kundi ako lang.

Naiinis din si Mama kapag ginagawa ko 'yun. Para raw akong siraulong ikot ng ikot at lakad ng lakad na wala namang patutunguhan.

Subalit, lingid sa kanyang kaalaman, maraming lugar na akong napupuntahan sa ginagawa kong paglilibot. Umaabot ako sa Parthenon, Europe, Greece, at ilang probinsya sa Pilipinas nang hindi nila namamalayan.

Ang paggamit ng imahinasyon ang tanging gamot ko upang makatakas sa kalungkutan ng aking mundo. At bagama't nais ko sanang may makausap upang matulungan akong tumakas sa bilangguan ng hinagpis, wala akong makitang taong mapagkakatiwalaan nang itinatagong sakit ng aking puso.

Akala ng marami, masaya ang aking kabataan. Madalas akong tumawa. Ngunit, sa likod ng matitinis kong halakhak, ay isang pusong lumuluha at humihiling na sana, sa paglalakbay ko sa ibang sulok ng mundo, matatagpuan ko ang isang taong tulad kong nahihirapan at nagdurusa...

Sana, matagpuan ko ang isang kaluluwang handang iabot ang kanyang kamay upang ilayo ako sa mapanglaw at mapanlinlang na mundong ito.

Sana, hindi ko kinakailangang itago ang laman ng puso ko at magpanggap na matatag sa kabila ng katotohanang nais nang bumigay ng pagkatao ko.

Hindi ako malakas. Hindi rin ako matatag.

Lalo na kung ang pinag-uusapan ay walang iba kundi -- IKAW.

One lonely soul. Naaalala kong minsan, isang gabi, hindi ako makatulog at pinili ko na lamang magsulat upang maibsan ang kalungkutang nadarama ko. Sa isang sulok ng madilim kong kwarto, naglalakbay ang aking diwa sa isang malayong pook; isang lugar kung saan makatatagpo ako ng isang kaluluwang tulad kong nalulunod sa kalungkutan.

Gusto kong tumungo sa lugar na iyon upang kahit papaano'y mabawasan ang bilang ng mga taong tumatangis at nahihirapan ng tahimik. Bilang isang taong dumaraan sa ganoong uri ng sakit, alam kong hindi madaling dalhin ang isang bagay nang nag-iisa. Kailangan natin ng kasama.

My idiosyncrasy seemed to be the only way for me to escape this precarious and pretentious world.

Many people would reach out their hand to you and try to comfort you. Some would even profess their love for you or even promise an eternity with you.

But then, promises, often, are meant to be broken.

And ALL not people who tell you they LOVE YOU truly mean it.

I have met many people who promised to be with me to love me. I have met some who have said they value my friendship and time. But most of these people tend to stay by my side because they can benefit from me.

Kailan kaya ako makararating sa pinapangarap kong sulok ng mundong iyon? Kailan kaya ako makararating doon upang mahanap ka?

I hope, it doesn't have to take a lifetime to search for you.

Ukit

2009-07-02T20:44:00.000+08:00

"Sa dinami-rami ng mga pangalang isinulat ko sa papel, ikaw lang ang bukod-tanging isinulat ko sa puso ko. "

Pero, mali ako. Dahil hindi lang kita basta isinulat sa puso ko. Iniukit ko ang bawat isang letra na tila ba isa ka sa mga taong bagama't dapat ko nang burahin ay hindi ko na magagawa pa. Nakaukilkil ang bawat titik sa aking puso sa pinakamariin at malalim na paraan.

Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili ko. Alam kong mali ang ginagawa ko pero para sa akin, tama ito. Sabi nila, ang pinakamabisang paraan upang makapagsimula nang panibago sa buhay ay ang talikuran ang mga alaala. Ngunit, papaano ko magagawa iyon kung ang buhay ay walang iba kundi IKAW? May silbi pa ba ang pagbabago kung hindi rin lang naman kita kasama?

Siguro, kung maririnig mo ang mga sentimyentong ito ng puso ko, wala kang ibang gagawin kundi ang pagtawanan ako. Ang cheesy kasi, eh! Pero, wala na akong magagawa dahil ito ang totoong laman ng puso ko sa mga oras na ito. Maging hanggang bukas, sa susunod na araw o maging sa mga darating pang araw na hindi ko na mabilang.

Namimiss na talaga kita. Tuwing umaga, kapag papasok ako sa eskwelahan, hindi ko mapigil ang sarili kong maisip kita. Hindi maaaring kahit sansaglit ay hindi ka sasagi sa isip ko. Pero, wala akong pinahihirapan kundi ang sarili ko...

Dapat na kitang kalimutan pero paano ko gagawin iyon?

Para akong mamamatay kung tuluyan kitang kalilimutan...

Can Love Really Kill or Is it Too Much Love? (Updated)

Do you believe that too much love can kill you? Or is there such thing as too much love? Do you remember this post?

Well, a lot of those who commented said they like the shirt's design. So I'm giving away shirts! But of course, it's not as easy as just throwing it away to you guys. hehe. You have to do a little work to get it. Yes, this is a contest and I am inviting you to join.

Pa-CONTEST!

Monz Avenue has now reached its 8th month in the blogosphere! Thanks to you.

As my way of showing gratitude for the continued support that you have shown to me and to my blog, I am running a contest. Oo na, gaya-gaya na ako. Peru eto uso ngayon eh. Hahlols. ^_^

I Need Sponsors!

Be a sponsor. Just leave a comment or send me an email at rayban1st@yahoo.com

So far, the Sponsors are:
* Chad of Coolbutsmokin.wordpress.com who offers cash through Paypal
* Rhona of Kofistains.com who offers cash through Paypal
* Reesie of Reesie.net who offers cash through Paypal
* Jehzeel of Jehzlau-Concepts.com who offers cash through Paypal
* Jerick of Rickspot.com who offers ad space at his site
* Bogcess of TechnoChase.com who offers cash through Paypal
* Mars of OrphicPixel.com who offers cash through Paypal
* Winkie of WinkiesWorld.wordpress.com who offers cash/E-load
* Cris of www.crisiboy.com who offers cash/E-load

(Ulit lang.)

Benefits of being a sponsor to this contest:
* You will own an AD space in the sidebar of this blog.
* The participants of the contest will include a link in their entry-posts to your respective blogs.
* One T-shirt for each cash sponsor.

To be a sponsor, you can donate cash through Paypal. Cash must be at least $8. You can also offer ad space. However ad space must be at least 120 x 150 pixels, a space good enough for small icons or small banner.

Terms and Conditions for the Sponsorship:
* For sponsors who would donate at least $8 to $12 cash through Paypal or Credit Card, in return, you will receive one T-shirt (size of your choice) and a 150 x 120 ad space in my sidebar (or as big as that OrphicPixel image in the sidebar) until December 2009.

* For sponsors who would donate cash ranging from $13 to $20, in return, you will receive one T-shirt and a 150 x 120 ad space in my side bar (or as big as that OrphicPixel image in the sidebar) for one-whole year. (From July 2009 to July 2010)

* For sponsors who would donate $21 and above, in return, you will receive two T-shirts and a permanent 150 x 240 ad space (banner) in the sidebar.

* E-loads or Philippine cash is also accepted (at least Php 300). Please contact me for further info.

The mechanics:
• Make a post about love, too much love, unrequited love, unconditional love and any kind of love that you could think of.
• Put this shirt design image (see above picture) anywhere on your post. The shirt image must have a link towards my blog. Note: Failure to do so disqualifies your entry.
* Include the links of the sponsors in your entry/post.

Should you wish to join, first, please go to this link and vote for this T-shirt design. Click here. Actually, this is optional but I'd appreciate it so much if you'll register to that site and vote for this T-shirt design.

Please join me celebrate by joining the contest. I'd appreciate it.

Join now! I can only accommodate 10 participants. So hurry!

Criteria for judging:
* Number of comments on your entry/post.
* Number of incoming links from your blog to my blog through that T-shirt image in your blog post. Let me know if this is not clear.
* Number of votes: I will put up a poll in the sidebar with the names of the participants after the 10 is completed.

Prizes (Tentative):
* All 10 participants will receive a shirt.
* $15 for the Ultimate Winner.
* $8 for the Voters Choice Awardee
* $8 for the Most Commented Poster

Note:
* I reserve the rights to change or increase the prizes. This information is still subject to change until July 20.
* Deadline of submission of entries is on August 3, 2009. The contest will close on August 7, 2009 and winners will also be announced on the same day.

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant.
- 1 Corinthians 13:4

In Memoriam I

2009-06-30T16:00:00.000+08:00

June 27, 2009

(Ang likha kong ito ay para sa pinakagwapo, pinakamabait at pinakamaalalahanin kong anghel na kasalukuyang ipinagdiriwang ang sana'y ika-21 niyang kaarawan ngayon. Kung nasaan ka man ngayon, tandaan mong mahal kita...)

"There's never a wish better than this,
When you only got 100 years to live."

Hindi na mahalaga ang oras para sa akin ngayon. Basta ang alam ko, humihinga ako, nakalalakad at tumitibok ang puso hindi para sa kaninuman -- maliban sa sarili ko. Napapagod na ako.

Bagama't pinipilit kong pagalin ang sarili ko sa pagganap sa mga responsibilidad ko, dumarating ang mga oras na inaakala ko sanang madalian kong paghimlay tungo sa mundo ng panaginip ay nahahalinhan ng ilang minuto nang pagluha.

Hindi kita makalimutan. Oo, alam kong apat na buwan at dalawampu't tatlong araw na ang lumilipas simula nang mawala ka. At marahil, kung nagawan kong malaman ang eksaktong oras kung kailan mo kami iniwan, pati iyon ay isasama ko sa pagbibilang. Apat na buwan at dalawampu't tatlong araw -- ganito katagal na palang nalulunod ang puso ko sa kalungkutan.
Tinutupad ko ang mga ipinangako ko. At isa lang ang tinitiyak ko sa'yo -- hindi ko ito ginagawa dahil sa napipilitan ako. Ginagawa ko ito dahil gusto ko at ginagampanan ko ang aking tungkulin nang may buong pagmamahal, pag-iingat at pagpapahalaga. Marahil, nagsisilbi kang inspirasyon upang mas pagbutihin ko ang aking tungkulin. Ngunit, kung narito ka lang sana sa tabi ko, marahil, magagawa mo akong gabayan at tulungan lalo na sa mga panahong nagkakaroon ako nang pag-aalinlangan at pangamba.

Nanganga pa ako. Alam kong baguhan lamang ako, subalit, nais kong ibigay ang isandaan, hindi, dalawang daan g porsyento ng aking sarili upang hubugin sila. amraming bagay ang nagbago simula nang mawala ka. Ngayon, natagpuan ko ang sarili ko sa pagitan ng mga alalala ng nakaraan at kasalukuyan. Natatakot akong humakbang pasulong pa... Ayokong kalimutan ka.

Minsan, iniisip kong baka nagpapahiwatig na ang Diyos na malapit na tayong magkasama. Minsan, kahit ako ay nahuhuli ko ang sarili kong parang nagpapaalam sa iba. Kanina nga lang, niloko ako ni Mama na patay na raw ako nang sinusubukan kong matulog. Paano kung isang araw, matulog ako at hindi na magising pa?

Ano ba ang naramdaman mo sa biglaan mong pagkawala? Natakot ka ba? Umiyak ka ba? Nasaktan ka ba?

Ayokong makita ang reaksyon mo nang makita mo kaming umiiyak para sa'yo. Kung pwede sana kapag naulit sa akin ang nangyari sa'yo, gugustuhin kong dagliang mabura ang alaala ko. Ayokong ako ang maging dahilan ng luha at sakit na mararamdaman ng mga mahala ko.

Malapit na ba? Sa totoo lang, wala talaga akong ideya. Basta ang alam ko, sa mga oras na inaakala kong huling hininga ko na, magigising akong muli sa isa pang panibagong araw.

Maligayang kaarawan sa'yo. Patawarin mo ako kung hindi kita nagawang dalawin ngayon...

(Raphaelle I. N. J.)

Untitled Part I

2009-06-15T14:37:00.000+08:00

May 15, 2009

Love is a salve as the summer breeze,
gently cooling, softly whispers to ease.
A moment's battle, an hour's struggle,
All vanish in a mother's cuddle.

I hear mother's whisper caressing me tender,
The warmth in her bosom providing shelter.
Lull me to slumber, hold me forever,
In a world of deception, confusion and terror.

-- Minsan, dumarating sa buhay natin ang mga panahong sana ay maaari pa tayong bumalik sa sinapupunan ng ating ina. Sa kanyang sinapupunan, mararamdaman natin ang pagkalinga at proteksyong walang kasing init at hindi napaparam.

Kung sana, pwede lang tayong maging mga sanggol habambuhay... Ngunit, kung mangyayari iyon, sino naman ang mag-aalaga sa ating magulang kapag sila ay tumanda? Pipiliin ba nating maging palaasa at humihingi ng tulong sa iba? Hindi ba sila magsasawang alagaan tayo habambuhay?

Dapat matuto rin tayong tanggapin ang mga pagbabago. Kaya nga tumatanda ang tao. Kaya nga nagkakaisip at gumagawa ng mga sariling desisyon.

Ayokong umasa habambuhay sa mga magulang ko.

(Binuo noong Mayo 15, 2009 habang tahimik na nakaupo malapit sa labasan ng eskwelahan. Kasalukuyan namin noong hinihintay ang pagdating ng isa naming opisyal bilang pagtupad sa obligasyon namin sa publikasyon.)

Fireflies

2009-06-08T17:13:00.000+08:00

A soft breeze blows through the trees,
As they silently witness my flowing tears.
When all of a sudden, tiny creatures with wings,
Caught my eyes as they move in such magical gleam.

I heard Mama's voice softly calling my name,
Such gentleness slowly healing this immense pain.
"Child, listen. Fireflies are the closest resemblance to the stars,
Hold them closely and they'll give such glow and warmth.
For spirits, like stars, watch over us every night,
Seeing them needed not the eyes but the heart."

I felt the cool touch of the wind on my skin caressing light,
Mother, is that you hugging me tight?

--Children are the best inspiration I have for making literary works. Nagkataon lang na isang araw, habang nagmumuni-muni, naramdaman ko ang hinagpis ng isang batang nawalan ng ina. At naidugtong ko ito sa isang senaryo kung saan nasa isang malawak na parang ang bata isang gabi at nanunuod ng mga alitaptap.

Matagal ko ng gustong makakita ng mga alitaptap. Sana, makakita rin ako nun... Kahit minsan lang. =)

Call for Entries

2009-05-25T14:24:00.000+08:00

-- Ito ay sinipi ko mula sa isang kapwa blogger na si Nhel Bryan ng www.bobosijuan.blogspot.com.

Editors Nikki Alfar and Vin Simbulan are now accepting submissions of short fiction pieces for consideration for the anthology "PHILIPPINE SPECULATIVE FICTION V".

Speculative fiction is the literature of wonder that spans the genres of fantasy, science fiction, horror and magic realism or falls into the cracks in-between.

1. Only works of speculative fiction will be considered for publication. As works of the imagination, the theme is open and free.

2. Stories must cater to an adult sensibility. However, if you have a Young Adult story that is particularly well-written, send it in.

3. Stories must be written in English.

4. Stories must be authored by Filipinos or those of Philippine ancestry.

5. Preference will be given to original unpublished stories, but previously published stories will also be considered. In the case of previously published material, kindly include the title of the publishing entity and the publication date. Kindly state also in your cover letter that you have the permission, if necessary, from the original publishing entity to republish your work.

6. First time authors are welcome to submit. In the first four volumes, we had a good mix of established and new authors. Good stories trump literary credentials anytime.

7. No multiple submissions. Each author may submit only one story for consideration.

8. Each story’s word count must be no fewer than 1,500 words and no more than 7,500 words.

9. All submissions must be in Rich Text Format (.rtf – save the document as .rft on your word processor) and attached to an email to this address: nikkialfar@gmail.com. Submissions received in any other format will be deleted, unread.

10. The subject of your email must read: PSF5 Submission: (title) (word count); where (title) is replaced by the title of your short story, without the parentheses, and (word count) is the word count of your story, without the parentheses. For example – PSF5 Submission: Meeting Makiling 4500.

11. All submissions must be accompanied by a cover letter that includes your name, brief bio, contact information, previous publications (if any). Introduce yourself.

12. Deadline for submissions is October 15, 2009. After that date, final choices will be made and letters of acceptance or regret sent out via email. Target publishing date is February 2010.

14. Compensation for selected stories will be 2 contributor’s copies of the published anthology as well as a share in aggregrate royalties.

Kindly help spread the word. Feel free to cut and paste or link to this on your blogs or e-groups.

Thanks,

Nikki Alfar

Vin Simbulan

--> KAYA JOIN NA!!!

--Nais ko pong humingi ng paumanhin kay G. Nhel Bryan. Nagkamali po ang pangalang nailagay ko sa una kong post nito.

Blas Ople Essay Entry : Declared as one of the Four Finalists last February 3, 2009 at the Aloha Hotel

2009-04-27T10:29:00.000+08:00

The Road to Greatness

Survivor. Achiever. Great Mentor.

To many, he was one of those politicians who kept the ball rolling for the country. Author of the Labor Code, made possible the way for the country’s close ties with the Organization of Islamic Conference (OIC), and presided over the 60^th General Assembly of the International Labor Organization (ILO) in Geneva, Switzerland, indeed Blas Fajardo Ople Jr. had proven to all that the once poor boy of Hagonoy, Bulacan would find his way to greatness despite the hardships he encountered in life.

Who would have thought that the once young boy, who sneaked frequently in their backyard to read his books, would grow up to be the government’s most enduring statesman making his way gracefully through the Magsaysay to Arroyo regime? Who is Blas Ople behind the endeavors he had received?

When asked about his secret formula for success, he simply replied – hardwork. True enough, Blas was inspired by the very example of his father who was a humble boat-repair man. This he showed through his exemplary work as the labor secretary of former president Marcos and foreign secretary of the Ramos administration.

“No one ever attains very eminent success by simply doing what is required of him; it is the amount and excellence of what is over and above the required that determines the greatness of ultimate distinction," according to Charles Kendall Adams. To go beyond everyone’s expectations was what the former senator and Senate President lived up to. He continued his goal of giving quality public service to the people.

At a young age, he had manifested advanced mental aptitude. Though he often transferred to different public schools in his town due to poverty, he still managed to graduate as the valedictorian of their class. The war had also intervened with the smooth flow of his life and education. In spite of all of these, his classmates still found him to be different from the rest of them.

Gabriel Morales, Ople’s childhood friend would fondly recall an incident where his buddy chose to save his ‘treasure’ despite the chaos filling their town during the war. While everybody ran in order to save their lives, he went behind and carried his heavy burden which was his books.

“My books were as precious as my life,” the former foreign minister would say. Knowledge is power, this he proved true. He was a college dropout yet local officials such as Carlos P. Romulo and former president Marcos valued his opinions and advices.

In a letter to Ople in September 1983 by Romulo, the once United Nations General Secretary, “You have risen to where you are now without the academic training that all of us had undergone. You have made up your excessive training which is shown in your speeches and the extemporaneous discussions in the Cabinet. I put all this on record for whatever future use you may make when your services are required for leadership in our country.”

One must never really let his schooling interfere with his education as Adam Smith quoted. Most of Blas’ intelligence and smart decision-making can be rooted to the many experiences he encountered after going out of the four corners of the classroom. He first worked as a stevedore then a desk man for the Daily Mirror before finally becoming a columnist for the said newspaper.

I had my own failures and I can no longer boast of my transcript of records as the evidence of my mental aptitude. But, as the former senator made me discover, I can also be a self-made person relying not much on the content of my textbooks and researches as my guide to achievement. He was nobody to me when I was still in high school. Yet, the more I read about him, the more I saw the similarities we had in life.

I am also a transferee. Although, I can no longer attain that cum laude title, I still believe that the institution I am in now is not the only venue where success can be found. Opportunity knocks when you least expect it. It finds you even if you are afraid to see it.

A self-made man – this is Ka Blas. Imelda Marcos always told in her interviews that the said senator had no one but himself to thank for his prolonged stay in the government post. His sincerity and devotion to his work was overwhelming. Integrity and dedication – these marked Ople’s character. The fact that he was chosen to become a member of the drafters of the 1986 Constitution showed how even former president Aquino expressed great confidence in him.

It is truly difficult that a man despite having all the power and fame in the world would choose to remain as the man he was before without the glory and the honor. Ople was one of the few officials, who were never charged of malfeasance or misfeasance. Power is intoxicating yet this Bulakenyo never thought of becoming one of those traditional politicians.

“A public servant in a democratic society must learn to take criticism in stride. Throughout a long public life, however, I have found that much of the personal criticism of a public servant is rooted in peer envy and jealousy, as though they have to avenge their own failures and frustrations on a more successful colleague. In such cases, it is right to ignore the critics and let them stew in their own poisoned juices of envy and jealousy,” Ople remarked. And this message does not only apply to politics but to every situation we Filipinos have. We, due to our envy and discord, tend to pull down our fellow countrymen when they have reached the top thinking that ruining their reputation would make us greater than them. However, we must remember that destroying other people does not make us rise above them. It only makes us smaller and unworthy of other people’s respect.

An influential figure – the mere fact that Ople succeeded in having descendants who would propagate his principles and ideals made evident his ability to make people see his vision. This is my first time to know him better. And whether I would live up to be like him or not still remains to be seen. Yet, the truth that he had influenced my life in his own little way cannot be disregarded. He had taught me one of the most valuable lessons in life – to remain firm and strong for your ideals despite the fact that you are tested beyond your limits.

Blas Ople’s greatness continues. Not even the fangs of death can surmount an unconquerable soul.

-- And so does Conrado Macapulay's legacy, too.

Posted by: Raphaelle (I.N.J.)

...

2009-03-19T15:13:00.000+08:00

I offer my silence to you.

You will always be remembered.

We love you.

Sweet dreams, my beloved EIC!

Conrado Abrugar Macapulay, Jr.

(June 27, 1988-February 16, 2009)

In pace requiescat.

TE DILIGO.

Knowing when to shut your mouth

2009-01-29T15:51:00.000+08:00

January 26 was a very memorable day for me. My teacher in Communications 2 gave as an examination that we should answer in one hour. Here is the question:

Using the U.S. standard for digital transmission, follow the encoding and decoding stages of the signal defined as V(t)=100sin *(omega)ct + 8 sin 3*(omega)ct with the frequency of 30 MHz, using the minimum Nyquist sampling rate Fs-(19/Fs) with step size of ADC or DAC given as 2.4 *(micro)V

(O 'yung mga ECE d'yan pati mga hindi ko kapwa ECE, sabay-sabay tayong dumugo ang ilong!☻)

I looked closely at the white board wondering if my eyes were fooling me or not. Holy Guacamole! What does he mean? It took me some minutes before I completely deciphered what he was asking us.

I tossed and turned on my seat and creased my forehead deeply trying to figure out a way of solving the problem. But the question was, what are we supposed to look for anyway???

Then suddenly, a brilliant idea came into my mind!

This is digital transmission and ideally, we should be converting a signal already in the digital form. However, we were given an analog signal. Therefore, we were left clueless on how to start answering the problem!

And since I can no longer think of a wonderful idea, I decided on commenting about the exam. Read the following lines carefully:

"Wala naman pong U.S. standard, eh. U.S.-Japan po at 'yun ay ang A-law." (Ok, so I admit that I was wrong about that! It should have been *(mu)-Law! Stupid me! And I had the guts to comment about it! (*_*))

I also added, "Sir, hindi 'to pwedeng i-transmit! Digital transmission nga, 'di ba? Bakit po analog signal ang ibinigay n'yo??? (-_-)**

Well, to be honest, I didn't mean to sound rude at that time. Like a curious child, I just wanted to know some things. But since my teacher doesn't know me well, I think he misunderstood my point why I wrote about the said observations.

The next day, January 27, I spotted him in front of the EE/ECE department together with my previous teacher last semester.

He told me he read my comment and tried to clarify some issues. Well, I just laughed it off thinking that it was ok for him. He was even smiling at that time. Naive me never thought that he was somehow irritated with me because I never really had any bad intention about my doing.

It was last Wednesday of January 28 that I received my test paper. He placed a comment there saying,

"Ineng, ganito kasi 'yan! Pumasok ka on-time para alam ang gagawin1 Simple lang 'yan, hindi mo lang naisip! Ok."
Love lots,
Bernie =)

He even told the class about my doing. Anyway, he also explained the solution to the said examination. It seemed quite simple but if you are not the bookish type, you may have difficulty understanding some of the terms which he mentioned during the discussion.

I thought that was the end of it. I was laughing inside the classroom because of my dirty little deed. But, to reiterate what I have said, I never really had any evil motive in mind regarding my doing. I just wanted to clarify some things because I was puzzled.

It was when I went to our office in Casal that I learned he was quite frustrated in me. He said that if you are a Voice staffer, then just continue being a Voice staffer.

Well, maybe I was being negligent with my studies. But TIP Voice is not the ONLY reason for my negligence. It was better if he said that I was not studying because I lost interest in it. But mentioning Voice in the middle of a situation you hardly know?? My God! Why do people keep blaming Voice for my shortcomings???

I am so fed up with people, including my parents and colleagues who keep telling me I should leave the ONLY THING THAT GIVES MEANING TO MY EXISTENCE BECAUSE IT IS USELESS TO PURSUE IT. Why can't they just let me be? Don't they really want to see me happy?

--Jesus, I completely put my faith in you. (I.N.J.)

*Sorry, I do not know how to put special characters in my blog so I opted to write the Greek name instead.

Broken into a Million Pieces

2009-01-12T16:33:00.000+08:00

Who Am I

By Casting Crowns

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wondering heart.

Not because of who I am.
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow.
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord you catch me when I'm falling,
And you told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again
Who am I?
That the voice that calm the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am.
But because what of youve done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow.
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord you catch me when I'm falling,
And you told me who I am.
I am yours.

Not because of who I am.
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

>> There were a lot of things that happened in my life. I stumbled, fell, lost hope, found desperation and sought for salvation. I have found the missing piece in me and have resolved the darkest, labyrinthine questions in my mind. I almost reached the zenith of my aspirations, but, God decided that I must be humbled. From the coveted place that I have long wanted, I was pulled down by the Lord so that I might be able to see the suffering of the oppressed and the lonely. What I have considered to be a time of darkness and sorrow turned out to be a moment of enlightening and hope. He has found me. And now, I know he will never let go of me. I put my whole trust in Him alone. In Him alone.

Raphaelle Resurrects

2008-12-12T13:33:00.000+08:00

Euphoria

By Raphaelle

Stacks of legal-sized paper were filed on top of his desk. He was searching for his ballpen in the middle of the clutter. He struggled with the mess for a few minutes but was eventually successful in finding what he was looking for.

Dark circles under his eyes and lines that filled the contours of his face completely hid the age that should have been twenty-five. Ambition – he remained focused in achieving his goals that he neglected himself of life’s comforts.

What were the things that men value in life? Prestiges, money, honor – it was said that without these one’s life would never be complete. Focus, he told himself as he now affixed his signature on a five-page document.

He stood up from his chair and stretched his weary arms.

“I need a cup of coffee,” he whispered to himself as he moved towards a nearby table. A sleepy head tends to make mistakes while doing his job.

“I think you need a break,” came a little voice near him. Startled, he almost dropped his cup and felt the hot splash of liquid on his hand.

“Ouch! Who the heck are you?”
His head automatically tilted to the direction of the voice. However, he found nobody around.

“Over here. Beside the coffee creamer.”

Warily, he followed the instruction and saw a thumb-sized creature on the table.

“What are you?” Unbelieving, he creased his eyes to confirm whether he was just imagining things. Then, he remembered the story of Gulliver and his encounter with a being known as a Lilliputian. “You’re not a Lilliputian, are you?”

“Nope. I’m an Abercromb. I came from Nottingham. My name is Meridian.”

“And what are you doing inside my office? Did my secretary allow you to enter?”

“Secretary? What is that? Anyway, I came here to fetch you. Come with me.”

“What? You want me to come with you? I am currently in the middle of an important business. Get out. You are disturbing my work.” The lines on his forehead are clearly pronounced now.

“Mr. Rosenduff, I came here with a purpose. I am fetching you. Here, take this.” The creature handed him a flower half of its size.

“What is this?”

“It’s a forget-me-not. Eat the pollen grains. We have a long journey ahead of us.”

“You want me to eat this? Who are you to order me around?”

The creature then let out a blast of electricity from its hand. “Follow me or suffer.”

“What the? Okay then.” Frightened, he immediately swallowed the grains that tasted pleasantly sweet. It reminded him of his favorite candy when he was a child. Suddenly, flashes of his innocent and carefree days came to his memory. Ah, he suddenly realized how his youth was robbed by time.

“What is this?” A smile now formed in his lips. He then felt his body getting lighter until he was a few inches above the ground. “What the heck is happening to me?”

“Forget-me-not grains have amylthelase, a formula that helps you remember long-forgotten memories. Do you know the principle of levitation? It’s a phenomenon that happens when a man is completely in a state of bliss and relaxation. That explains why you are floating. Now that you are ready, let’s go. ”

Puzzled, he just stared at Meridian.

“Don’t just stare at me. Move. You can fly with me now to Nottingham.”

They then traveled across the skies and felt the cool rush of wind upon their skin. He was now as free as a seagull! Mr. Arthur Rosenduff, the executive, is Peter Pan now!

It only took them a few minutes before they saw a floating valley among the clouds with a breathtaking beauty no mortal eye has ever seen. A crystal clear waterfall completed the scenery. There were pixies and leprechauns and characters he remembered meeting in his old storybooks. Laughter and merriment filled the place intoxicating him with that peaceful ambience he felt during childhood. Déjà vu – he automatically had that feeling that he had been here before.

Meridian beckoned him to come closer. “Arthur, welcome to Nottingham. This world is open for children and grown children who have forgotten their youth. I once brought you here when you were young. But I doubt if you can still recall that one.”

“Arthur! You came back!” Three little fairies appeared before his eyes as if they expected him.

“Do I know you?” He asked shyly, unaware that everybody’s eyes were fixed on him.

“So you did choose to grow up, didn’t you?” One fairy blurted out the words as if accusing him of a grave sin.

“Everybody grows up.” He said matter-of-factly.

“Meridian, perhaps you can make him remember some of the important details?” Another fairy added.

The creature nodded.

“Come with me, Arthur.” Then they moved towards the forest filled with glittering, enchanted trees.

They are now in the heart of the forest. Arthur saw a swirling mass of silver liquid in what seemed to be a spring.

“What type of spring is this?” He cannot help but ask.

“It’s called the Pensieve of Oblivion. People and creatures place the memories they wish to forget here.”

“Uhm. Okay.”

“Put your hand in the water.”

As soon as he placed his hand in the liquid, some of its tiny droplets went around him and enveloped him.

Flashes of memories came all of a sudden. Days when he played and ran with some of the fairies and made music with Meridian enlightened him. But one particular memory that he wanted to forget was brought back to him. Tears came streaming down his eyes.

“You once came here with me. When you were a child, you were one of those few who were gifted with the ability to see us. But when your mother died, you decided that you wanted to forget everything about your childhood. You wanted that painful part of your youth to be erased. I granted you your wish.”

He remained standing fixed there, his head bowed down to the ground. He is crying.

“Hush now, Arthur. We must go back.” Meridian held his hand.

Although he was shaking, he nodded. They moved across the skies. While they were above the clouds, Arthur turned to his friend.

“Meridian, can I still come back here?”

His friend just smiled.

Arthur Rosenduff stretched his weary arms. He was too exhausted he didn’t notice he already fell asleep. Strange, he said to himself. He dreamt of a wonderful place where he saw creatures he vaguely remembered. It was just a dream, that was true but why did it seem real?
As he rose from his seat, he noticed something strange on his cluttered desk.

There was a tiny forget-me-not there.

(Made on December 3, 2008)

Kung kailan dapat yumukod at magpakumbaba...

2008-03-13T16:44:00.000+08:00

It is better to slip with your foot than to slip with your tongue...

Kahapon na siguro ang pinakamasamang araw sa buhay ko...

May isang bagay akong nagawang bagama't alam kong mali ay nagawa ko pa rin...

Kung tutuusin, sinusundot pa nga rin ako ng konsensya ko hanggang ngayon, eh. Akala ko nga, hindi ako makakatulog kagabi...

Ganito kasi 'yon....

Defense namin kahapon kay Olay. Sa totoo lang, ilang araw na akong naaasar sa kanya dahil nga sa bukod sa isang linggo bago ang submission namin niya binigay ang project na iyon, hindi niya kami tinuruan ng maayos para naman sa gayon ay mapagana namin nang matiwasay ang nasabing proyektong itago na lang natin sa pangalang Chorva. Bahagi 'yan ng trabaho ng isang nag-aasam maging isang Electronics and Communications Engineer.

Ang siste, ilang araw na akong banas na banas dahil sunud-sunod na araw na kaming nagpupuyat at may pagkakataon pang hindi kami natulog para lang sa damuhong proyektong iyon na hindi naman namin alam ang patutunguhan at lalong hindi namin alam kung mapapagana ba namin para masabing karapat-dapat nga kaming maging Electronics Engineers...

Marso 12, 2008 - Ayun na! Sa wakas dumating din ang araw ng defense namin. Ang sabi niya, 3:30 p.m. daw ang simula ng defense at lahat kami ay dumating sa oras.

Kaya lang, nahuli pa rin kami ng umpisa dahil nga sa may isa pa siyang hawak na section ng Electronics II na kasalukuyan ding nagdedepensa ng mga sarili nila ng pagkakataong iyon.

Lumipas pa ang mga oras na naghintay kami...

May nagbaliw-baliwan, nagkulitan, asaran at sapakan na sa mga kaklase ko upang mapalipas ang pagkabagot na unti-unting lumalamon sa aming pagkatao... May iba pa ngang nagmistulang estatwa at monumento sa tagal nang pagkakatayo nila sa isang sulok.

Isipin mo ba naman, tama bang maghintay ka ng mahigit limang oras sa labas ng defense room at lamunin na ng large intestine mo ang small intestine mo sa sobrang gutom???

Lalo tuloy nag-igting ang inis na ilang araw na ring namumuo sa aking dibdib!

Sa wakas, matapos ang sampung taon, tinawag na rin kami ng lalaking itago na lang natin sa ngalang Olay...

Lima kami sa grupo. Nauna ang mga kasama ko. Huli akong natawag dahil alphabetically speaking, panghuli ang apelyido ko.

Nang nakaupo pa ako at nakikinig sa mga kagrupo ko, sinabi ko sa sarili kong, "Relax lang, brad... Magpakahinahon ka. Hindi mo alam kung ano ang pwede niyang gawin sa'yo 'pag humulagpos ang galit mo."

Pero, iba ang nangyayari sa aktuwal na buhay.

Galit na galit ako at sumambulat sa kaawa-awang nilalang na nabanggit ko. [Teka nga, nakakaawa ba talaga siya???]

Sinagot ko siya sa tuwid na Ingles at pinagdiinan kong kailangan namin ng isang gurong magtuturo sa amin ng mga konsepto ng isang asignatura. Bagama't may libro na maaari mong pagsanggunian, hindi lahat nang nababasa mo ay kaya mong maintindihan dahil na rin sa 'technical terms' na nakasulat doon.

Sinabi niyang, "That is the purpose why I gave you that project." [Hindi siya magaling mag-Ingles. Halatado naman kasi hindi maganda ang kanyang diction at barok pa ang kanyang pronunciation! Isa pa, paulit-ulit lang ang mga tanong niya!!!]

Sabi ko, "That is not sufficient, Sir."

Tapos, medyo nahilo yata siya sa Ingles ko kaya naman nang magtuluy-tuloy ako ng pagsasalita, kinailangan niyang ipaulit sa akin ang mga sinabi ko dahil hindi niya maintindihan ang gusto kong iparating.

"What are those technical terms?" [Medyo nakakunot ang noo at baluktot pa ang dila niyang pagsabi dito. Nosebleed! In scientific terminology, this is also known as EPISTAXIS!]

"Sir, the h-parameter thing and that diode model concept which was written in the book."

"So, did you understand it?"

"No, Sir. That actually caused our difficulty in making the project," bato ko pa.

Ang sumunod na pangyayari, blangko. Katahimikan. [Hindi na yata niya alam kung ano ang sasabihin niya. Nahihirapan maghanap ng English words! Bwahahahah!!!]

Tinanong ko naman siya nang may kinalaman sa iniisip kong naging dahilan nang kapalpakan ng project namin. Sa huli, nasagot niya ang tanong ko at sinabi kong, "Sir, I think that is what caused the malfunctioning of our project."

Sa wakas, natapos din kami. Ang resulta? 'Ayun... Bad trip!

Lumabas ako ng eskwelahan na banas na banas, nanginginig sa galit at gustong sumapak ng tao. Kasabay ko papunta sa sakayan ang isa sa mga kagrupo ko.

Sabi niya sa akin,"Che, hindi mo dapat ginawa iyon. 'Yun nga 'yung mismong gustong matutunan natin ni Sir, eh. 'Yung matutong mag-self -study at malaman ang kaibahan ng practical sa theory. Alam mo, sa ginawa mo, natapakan mo ang ego niya."

Matagal ko nang alam iyon. Pero sa isip-isip ko, kahit na magawa niyang ituro sa amin iyon, na iba ang matutuklasan mo sa totoong buhay, naiinis pa rin ako.

Matagal ko na nga kasing alam iyon. Ang punto ko, para kasi kaming mga sundalong pinasugod sa giyera nang walang dalang sandata. May dala man, depektibo naman.

Kung siguro tinuruan niya kami nang maayos, bagama't mahirapan kami, hindi kami literal na mangangapa sa kawalan para sa mga kasagutang ni hindi nga namin alam kung tama ba o mali, kung dapat gamitin o hindi ba dapat.

Sana, maintindihan niya na may basehan ang galit ko. Hindi ako basta-basta nagagalit ng walang rason.

At sa totoo lang, mahaba ang pasensya ko. Dapat nga ilagay siya sa Guiness Book of World Records dahil nagawa niyang putulin ito...

Pero, bagama't nasa tama ako, sa huli naisip kong may mali ako. Kahit pa nasa tamang paninindigan ako, hindi tamang sagut-sagutin ko siya dahil teacher pa rin siya. Mas matanda siya at kung tutuusin, mas maraming alam.

Kung hindi ko man siya magawang irespeto bilang isang guro, sana nagawa ko siyang irespeto bilang isang tao...

Napagpasyahan ko ring humingi ng dispensa sa kanya. Kasi nga, hindi tama ang ginawa ko.

Hindi ko na pwedeng mabawi ang nasabi ko na... Pero, pwede kong ipakitang handa akong tumanggap ng pagkakamali...

That, I think is the true measure of maturity...

Hintuturo, Dapat Magturo!

2008-03-03T15:30:00.000+08:00

Para saan ba ginawa ang hintuturo natin? Talaga bang nilikha siya ng Diyos upang manuro at manisi?

Sa maraming araw sa buhay ko, madalas kong ginagamit ang hintuturo lalo na sa mga pagkakataong hindi ko na kayang kontrolin ang mga pangyayari sa buhay ko. Leche! Bakit hindi ko pwedeng pahintuin o patigilin ang pagdagsa ng problema ko sa buhay! Minsan, hinihiling ko na sana, ako na lang si Bruce Almighty para kahit isang araw man lang eh tantanan na ako ng mga suliraning ito...

Gaya, ngayon. Eto at gagamitin ko na naman siya para manuro at manisi ng isang nilalang! Itago na lang natin siya sa pangalang Olay... Siya na ang pinakasinusumpa at kinaiinisan kong prof sa tanang buhay ko..

Noong mga nakaraang araw, nalaman ko na ang midterm grade ko sa kanya. Grabe, bagsakan ang midterm grades ng lola n'yo sa Elects2 at Elective !!!! Saan ka nakakita ng markang 71 at 64, ha?

Sa sobrang inis ko, umiyak ako sa sobrang sama ng loob.... (Syempre, hindi ko 'yun pinakita sa kanya...)

Umiyak ako sa chapel ng isang kilalang eskwelahan sa bandang U-Belt at doon ay ibinuhos ko ang sama ng loob ko kay Lord.

Ok lang sana 'yun kung ang pagkukulang na iyon ay nagmula sa akin. Pero ang sama nito, hindi iyon galing sa akin kundi dahil iyon sa kanya!

Sobra-sobra kung magbigay ng expectations pero hindi naman marunong magturo...

Sa computer, bago lumabas ang kung anu-anumang display sa screen, kailangan mong maglagay ng impormasyon para may maipakita siya...

Parang sa estudyante. Hindi sila makapaglalabas ng magandang resulta kung hindi ka marunong magturo at magbahagi ng kaalaman...

Simpleng konsepto lang 'yan ng input at output!!! (Sana pala inaral niya ng mabuti ang basic concepts ng computers.)

Hay, malagay nga siya sa Whapack!!!

Disabled

2008-02-22T11:03:00.000+08:00

Kagabi habang pauwi ako sa bahay lulan ng jeep na ang ruta ay Cubao-Divisoria, nag-isip-isip ako...

Huminto ito sandali sa harap ng isang kilalang fastfood chain at ako'y nagmasid hanggang mapansin ko ang isang interesanteng bagay.

Nakita ko ang isang rampang may logo ng "DISABLED" sign.

Napaisip ako nang malalim sa tunay na kahulugan ng simbolong iyon at ang implikasyon niya sa buhay ko...

Lahat ng tao nakararanas nang pagkabaldado kung minsan...

Baldado hindi lamang sa pisikal kundi maging sa emosyonal, ispiritwal at mental na aspeto.

Pakiramdam ko kasi, baldado ako ngayon...

Na lahat ng bagay na ginagawa ko ay walang silbi o dahilan... Na pinanghihina at pinagugupo na ko ng lahat ng karanasang sumusubok s apagkatao ko...

Pagod na pagod na ako...

Pakiramdam ko, isa lang akong baldadong bagamat humihinga at nakakikilos ay hindi naman kayang tumayo sa sarili niyang paa upang panindigan ang mga pagpapasya niya.

Lagi na lang akong umiiwas... Lagi na lang akong tumatakas...

Lagi na lang akong umiiyak sa tuwing nahihirapan at nasasaktan ako. Lagi na lang luha ang isinasagot ko sa mga problema ko...

Oo, madalas nakikita ng mga tao ang ngiti sa mukha ko... Subalit, hindi nila napapansin ang mga luha at sakit sa likod ng mga halakhak ko...

(Shit! I hate being emo again!!!)

Darn it! I just can't help myself from bursting out and letting go of all these painful emotions welling up inside of me... The worst part is, I use my blog entries in order to unleash my hidden sentiments and agonies...

Oo, lahat tayo minsan sa buhay natin ay gustong maging baldado... Baldado upang magawa nating umasa sa ibang tao.. Umaasa na sana, ang mga taong iyon na lamang ang sumalo at dumanas sa lahat ng sakit na pinagdaraanan natin...

Aminin mo, hindi ba minsan, gusto mong sabihing, "Bakit nangyayari sa akin ito? Karapat-dapat ko bang danasin ang mga bagay na ito? Bakit hindi na lang napunta sa iba ang problema ko?"

At bilang pakunswelo sa sarili, sasabihin mo na lang, "Hindi ito ibibigay sa akin kung hindi ko kaya ito..."

Tama ba ang ganitong uri ng mentalidad sa mga problema mo?

Hindi ba pwedemg dumating ang oras na sumuko ka na at umatras sa laban para naman sa gayon ay tantanan ka na ng problema???

Baka naman kapag umiwas ka at magtago ay magsawa na ang problema mo sa'yo... Baka naman kapag nakita ng Diyos na hindi mo na kaya ay itigil niya na ang pagpapahirap sa'yo...

Naisip mo na ba ang bagay na ito?

Teka, sino ba ang gustong maging baldado? Sino ba ang gusto nang sumuko sa buhay at umatras sa hamong ibinibigay nito?

Ikaw, gusto mo ba?

Ako, gusto ko ba?

Ang gaga ko talaga... Sometimes, I wish I was emotionally disabled... So that I would no longer feel pain and become numb to the sounds of my own misery...

--Raphaelle (I.N.J.)

Prinsipyo ang Dapat Umiral...

2008-02-01T10:42:00.000+08:00

Hay, minsan sa buhay, kinakailangan nating mamili... Sapagkat ito ang bagay na sumusukat hindi lamang sa ating katatagan kundi maging sa atin ding pagkatao... Mahirap para sa akin ang desisyong ito subalit, paninindigan ko.

Kanina lamang ang kumuha ako ng pagsusulit sa asignaturang Inhenyerong Ekonomiya. [Well, sadyaan daw bang babuyin ang translation ng Engineering Economy?] Pilitin ko mang arukin at analisahin ang mga tanong ay hindi ko makuha kahit na isang sagot.

Akala ko pa naman, dahil multiple choice iyon ay madali na...

As expected, wala akong nasagot kahit na isa...
Kaya ang inaasahan at talaga namang lalabas sa aking midterm exam ay...

ZERO!!! [Ala Sir Ybañez style ng pagsasalita!]

Akalain mo 'yun? Zero ang midterm exam ko???

At akalain mong magpopost ako ng ganito dito. [Oooops! Hindi ako nag-aambisyong gayahin ang nasimulan na ni G. Allego... (^-^) ]

Hindi ko mapigilang mag-isip ng kung anu-ano. Kesyo, marahil sinadya iyon ni Chorva para mahirapan kami at mapilitang mag-donate ng dugo. Kesyo ang bobo-bobo ko at ni hindi man lang ako nakapagpalabas kahit isang sagot...

Subalit ang lahat ng iyon ay haka-haka lamang... Wala ni isa ang katotohanan.

Masakit mang isipin, ang tuksong kanina pa tumutudyo sa akin na mag-donate ng dugo at ilagay ang pangalan ni chorva2 doon ay pilit naglilikot sa aking isip.

Noong mga nakaraang araw kasi, sinabi na ni Olay ang tungkol sa Bloodletting Activity na iyon at nagpapalista siya sa papel ng mga nilalang na interesadong magbigay ng dugo.

At iyon ay may kapalit...

10 points kada isang bag ng dugo sa Midterm exam pati na rin siguro sa quizzes namin...

Sa totoo lang, nabighani ako sa bagay na iyon dahil medyo nangangailangan na nga ako ng panghila sa kanya... Hindi ako gumawa ng 100 solved problems sa Elects2 at Elective1. Hindi rin ako nakapag-take ng kaisa-isang quiz namin sa Elective1 dahil sa na-late ako ng dating sa pag-aasikaso ng mga articles ko...

Subalit, sinabi ko pa rin sa sarili ko na kung sakaling tutulong man ako, iyon ay sa kadahilanang bukal sa loob ko ang pagtulong at hindi dahil naghihintay ako ng kapalit niyon...

Buo na ang pasya ko. Sabi ko, bahala nang magkaletse-letse dahil prinsipyo at pagkatao ko ang nakataya dito...

Eh, eto na nga. Dumating ang midterm sa EngEco. Inaasahan ko nang mahirap siya pero ang hindi ko maintindihan ay kung bakit SOBRANG HIRAP niya!!!

Parang nananadya talaga! Bakit naman gano'n? 'Yung mga tanong doon ay hindi naman namin halos natalakay... Hindi k0 talaga maintindihan kung bakit...

Kanina nga, todo dasal ako kay Lord na sana 'wag niya akong pababayaan... Tinutukso din ako ng alalahaning napakalaking porsiyento ng midterm exam at kailangan ko nang panghatak para hindi ako bumagsak...

Bakit naman gano'n? Inisip ko na lang, "Sige, bahala na... Bagsak na kung bagsak... Pero hindi talaga ako pipirma na may nakalagay na pangalan ni Olay o chorva2 doon sa donor form...

Hindi talaga...

Prinsipyo at pagkatao ang dapat umiral...

Voodoo-vadoo???

2008-01-31T14:47:00.000+08:00

Hay, buhay... Buntunghininga!

Eto na naman po ako... Matapos kong ipahayag ang aking taos- pusong paghanga sa isang nilalang na itatago ko na lamang sa pangalang Lullaby, narito na naman ako upang muling magpahayag nang isang 'di inaasahang pangyayari sa buhay ko... At sangkot ang nilalang na nabanggit ko...

Sinamahan ko lamang si Bill noon para magpapirma ng isang kasulatan sa kanyang guro. Patungo kami noon sa P.E. Center at abalang-abala sa pag-uusap ukol sa mga personal na bagay na sa tingin ko ay di na dapat pang mabanggit sa blog na ito...

Bigla na lamang, walang kaanu-ano at wala ring kaabug-abog ay nakasalubong namin ang isang di inaasahang tao...

Si Lullaby!

Kasalukuyan ko namang dala-dala sa aking mga bisig ang dalawa kong anak na si Kuki (Cookie) at Ginger.

Akalain mo ba namang sabihan ako ni Sir na...

"Mangkukulam ka ba???"

At ang reaksyon ko nama'y...

"???"

Mukha ba akong mangkukulam na nangungulam sa pamamagitan ng mga manika? Hello! Ang cute-cute kaya ng mga anak ko para masabihang, "Ginagamit mo ba 'yan sa pangkukulam?"

Excuse me... Hindi pang voodoo ang mga manika ko...

Isa pa, masyado akong CUTE para maging isang mangkukulam...

Si Kuki at si Ginger ay hindi katulad ni Chelsea at lalo na ni Chaka doll...

Ayun...

The bottomline is...

Bakit n'ya sinabi iyon sa akin?

Natutuwa ba siya sa mga anak ko?

O natutuwa siya sa akin???

"???"

Tapos Ka Na...

2008-01-30T11:39:00.000+08:00

Hay, isang panibagong semestre na naman! Puno ng kasiyahan subalit puno rin ng problema... Sa totoo lang, isang subject lang naman ang talagang pinoproblema ko. 'Yun ay walang iba kundi ang [drum rolls]-- STRENGTH OF MATERIALS!!!

Sa totoo lang, high school pa lang ay wala na akong hilig sa asignaturang pisika... [Ayos! Filipinong- filipino!!!]
Ewan ko ba. Walang kwenta kasi ang mga naging teacher ko noong mga panahong iyon kaya hindi ko siya masyadong na-appreciate. Ewan ko rin ha kung talagang walang hilig sa akin ang asignaturang ito o talagang ayoko lang matuto... Ako kasi ang tipo ng tao na kapag gusto kong gawin ang isang bagay, kahit gaano pa kahirap 'yan, kakayanin ko. Tingnan mo na lang ang Voice at acads na pinagsasabay ko ngayon! Pero sa totoo rin lang, [Well, I am being redundant here.] first time kong ma-appreciate ang isang physics-related subject tulad ng Strength.

Oo, aaminin ko, mahirap na teacher si Lullaby...

Pero sa lahat ng naging teachers ko sa tanang buhay ko na nagturo sa akin ng ganitong klase ng asignatura, siya ang pinakaminahal at pinahalagahan ko.

Siguro, matapang at istrikto ang tingin ng karamihan ng populasyon ng TIP sa kanya [Isama mo na pati iyong mga nakaririnig lang ng mga kwento mula sa mga ALAWS (term ni Sir para sa mga walang utak or shall we say, tamad na estudyante? Hehehe.. Quotable quote from Sir uli!).

Pero eto ha, walang halong kaplastikan. Serbisyong totoo lamang!

Siya ang pinakaidolo kong prof. [Oy, nag-aambisyon ng palitan si Sir! Mwik!! Heheheh!!!]

Ewan ko ba pero ang tingin ko kay Lullaby ay isang institusyon, higit sa lahat, isang AMA.
Oo, tama ang nababasa mo...

Kasi, ramdam ko ang pagpapahalaga at pagmamahal n'ya sa mga estudyante.

Kahit pa sabihin mong halos every week, may assignment kayo.

Kahit pa sabihin n'yong isa siyang terror at duduguin ka sa mga exams na ibinibigay niya.

Mahal ko pa rin siya.

Sana, noon ko pa nakilala si Sir... Siguro, kung nangyari iyon, natutunan kong mahalin at pahalagahan ang asignaturang Pisika.

O hail, Lullaby!!!

[Kaso, may isa akong pangamba... Papasa kaya ako sa kanya???]

Well, that question remains to be answered...

And the answer, I know, must rely on me...

Poetry

2008-01-29T13:01:00.000+08:00

Mata Hari

Lovely enchantress, dance with me tonight,
with the moon and stars watching thy graceful flight.
Oh, mystical seductress, men swoon for thine eyes,
longing to own you even for just one night...
Listen, they promise eternal treasures
to imprison you in their arms.
Yet a stealthy glow was found in those mystic eyes.
Should you deceive or be of true-heart to him?
Their hearts become captives of your charms.

And the silence was broken,

The melody stopped all of a sudden...
Your feet entangled to the chains of fire!
They found you guilty of a heinous crime!
An innocent perpetrator held in a shameful trial,
A traitor to your country, a despicable spy!
You were destined to face such a fatal line,
Bullets cut through your skin, and your flesh stained with blood,
As the passion of men in guns put an end to your distress,

Lovely enchantress, as you breathe your last,

Now you are one with the stars...

Vraisemblance: The Birth

2008-01-08T14:38:00.000+08:00

The time has come for me to reveal myself, an intricate creation so-fashioned to fulfill a prophecy known only to me alone. Call it eccentric, even lunatic but I believe that every being has a purpose in this world... I am destined to find the meaning to my existence, the depth to my soul. I am my own creation. Love me or hate me, but the truth would still remain that I am no one but I alone... Love me or hate me, that is your prerogative. Call me idealistic but I would still be the person I ought to be...

Welcome to my world... An intricate tapestry of truth and twisted lies, it may seem to be, but this is reality to me. Dare to venture into my hidden thoughts and fantasies to discover a lovable or despicable being who is none but I...